I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize