eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Randomize
