What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
