I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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