Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
