I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
