She's JV to your varsity
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
