So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
