dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
