But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
whose ass print is on the piano?
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Randomize
