my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
