is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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