Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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