i permit you to call me
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
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