Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
