im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
