Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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