Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Randomize
