did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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