What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
We left the knife in your bed.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
