im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
