If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Randomize
