you're like a bully in the Christmas story
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
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