I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
