Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?