she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
