Your tits are I can't wait for
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
