I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
