that's an acceptable place to lick
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
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I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
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Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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