I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
