Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
ugly people sure do ruin things
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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