What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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