In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
