belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize