ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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