lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
