pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Randomize
