i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I can't put those talents on a resume
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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