i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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