I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
