Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
