Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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