if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Randomize
