mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
