I want to stick my p in your. b.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
