..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
