There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize