a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
