just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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