His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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